There were three others, though, that were serious and possessing more than average talent. We hung out together. It was pretty good. Music. Friends. But then Brian started hitting on me. At first it was kind of cute and flattering and I sort of fended him off. But lately he's making me uncomfortable. And I won't EVER be alone with him.The four of us went to a concert. I mean, I'm sort of angling towards that college anyway, so I try to go to any of their music functions I can. That's where I saw Johanna and Stoney for the first time. Johanna, I could believe. It's a chamber orchestra, and naturally they have a flutist.It wasn't even unusual that they chose her for the solo. She's that good. But they brought out Stoney. He was limping a bit, and carrying a banjo. I had all kinds of thoughts about that. I know this professor/conductor's reputation. He's been known to bend the rules a bit when it comes to classical music. But a BANJO? That's quite a bend.I recognized the music, even if. In the same way, what seems ‘normal’ to someone who sees a lot of pornography, or has experienced a steady escalation in the material they’re viewing, may be far from normal (and even abhorrent) to someone who doesn’t - or has, but decided it wasn’t for them.The take-home, though, is that pornography is not in-and-of-itself, the problem. How pornography use affects your life, self-image and your relationships, can be.These effects can be very subtle in how they affect a partner or a wider circle of friends, and cumulative over time. It could lead to you feeling dissatisfied with your behaviour or how you look, attempts to introduce sexual practices that your partner is not comfortable with, a compulsion to act out fantasies that put you at risk, financial outlays that put you under pressure or eschewing real life experiences in order to live out fantasies online.If you’re not sharing an aspect of your sexuality (i.e. your porn preferences) with a partner, it’s harder for them to be.
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